


Dear Captor, I Love You

by SoulSnatcher1289



Category: Naruto
Genre: Abuse, Aftermath of Violence, Bottom Uchiha Sasuke, Diary/Journal, Fear, Graphic Description, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kidnapping, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Mentions of Neji Hyuuga/Sasuke Uchiha, Missing Persons, Mpreg, Non-Graphic Violence, Out of Character, Past Relationship(s), Psychological Torture, Reminiscing, Seme Uzumaki Naruto, Stalking, Stockholm Syndrome, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Threats of Violence, Top Uzumaki Naruto, Triggers, Uke Uchiha Sasuke
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2019-05-25 20:22:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14984873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoulSnatcher1289/pseuds/SoulSnatcher1289
Summary: He had me down here, down here in a damp basement. There’s a small window, sometimes light pour in for hours on end before it becomes dark once again. Day and night, the window my only teller of time.





	1. Shackles

 

He had me down here, down here in a damp basement. There’s a small window, sometimes light pour in for hours on end before it becomes dark once again. Day and night, the window my only teller of time.

I don't know how long I've been down here, maybe a second, a minute, a year, an eternity. Maybe I died here, maybe even in death I can't leave. But I'm not dead, he still comes down here and stares at me. His eyes burning holes into me, searing my flesh off my bones with his cold gaze. He doesn't hate me, he has me shackled over top a thousand pillows and a thousand feathers. He left his plants around me, letting me smell the scent of the outdoors. He gives me books, letting knowledge flood my mind when I feel as if it's going numb from staring through that window.

I'm naked yet I'm not cold. There's a heater. The only coldness, is the shackle around my ankle, reminding me that my life is not my own.

I reached down and caressed the cold rusted metal, my ankle red. He would never take them off, even to bath me, he kept it on. Never wanting me to leave. Why am I here. Why is he here. What is this place.

 

-xxxx-

 

“Sasuke.” He says my name. He commands my name, he owns my name. I look up, naked and afraid. He's struck me, early on, beat me black and blue. I cried for nights and days. Cried for my mother, my father, my brother. I knew now to answer when he calls, to obey his every word. I'm his.

“Yes, my love.” He made me call him that. He made me. He made me. He made me.

“How was your day?” He asked, sitting on my thousands of pillows and thousands of feathers with a steak and potatoes dinner placed in front of him. I begun speaking, imaginary tales of how my day was; the walk in the park I never took, the lady whom I spoke to but have not spoken to, the rain that touched my skin that hasn't felt rain in a millennium. He listened, smiling as he ate.

“How was yours?” I'd ask back, because it's rude to not ask back. If you don't ask back, you get slapped. Always ask back, always ask back.

“You're brother and I had a great time on our date, he spoke of you. He told me you had passed away, deemed dead.” My body shook but I said nothing with a smile. Always smile because if you don't smile you don't eat. Always smile. Always smile.

He was dating my brother, dating my blood, deceiving my brother, he had been for a month. I had been gone long enough for people to start moving on, leaving me behind. I was a mere ghost now, dead. In this damp basement, I rot.

“He's not you, not as thin. Not as beautiful. Not as fresh.” He caressed my legs and I shivered, his touch heating my skin. I was a virgin before him. I was many things before him.

I was free.

I was free.

Oh so free.

“Sasuke, tell me what you think?” No, not what I think. Only what will make it so he won't hurt me. I no longer think for myself, I think for my life.

“I want you for myself, my broth- Itachi can't give you what you want.” I trembled. I didn't want him. I wanted my freedom. I wanted my life. He cupped my swollen stomach, massaging it. Loving it. Loving what's his. Not mine, never mine. Everything is his.

My hair.

My hands.

My heart.

My soul.

The life growing inside.

 

“A baby. He can't give you a baby.” I almost sobbed out. But, I held it in. No crying. Crying ruins his mood, bad mood means bad things. He smiled, chewing at his steak. Pleased at how I trembled and how I spoke.

“How is my baby doing?” He asked me, gazing at my disgusting body. A pregnant body shouldn't be so thin, my stomach protruding. Yet my skin wrapped tenderly around my ribs, my eyes sunken in.

“Very well, my love. He's growing, eating everything you give me. Barely leaving any for me, his mother. A big baby, a selfish baby. I hope your son comes out strong.” I whispered and he moved closer to me, sitting on my cloud. The cloud that hovered me, made me feel like I had already floated to heaven.

“He will be strong. Menma. Menma will be just like his father.” Oh God, please no. I prayed silently, watching as he cooed at my stomach. It growled and he looked up, I froze. His eyes and my darted to his half finished steak. He spoke two words, oh those sweet words.

“Eat it.” And I lunged, feeding myself to feed my son who left me nothing just like his father who left me nothing.

As I chewed on my food, the phone rang. Rings used to be tension and relief. Relief because I may be saved, tension because Naruto could get caught. But, things were different now. I had been here so long, nothing mattered. No one was looking for me. Naruto wasn't scared and I no longer hoped. I gave up.

He kissed my forehead before leaving, leaving me to my own peace. I could here him talk. He was laughing on the phone. With who I wonder. He never laughed with me, maybe it was my brother. My mother. My father. The neighbour. His next victim. Who knows. I wonder if they know he had a missing person down here. Oh no, a dead person. I sometimes forget.

When the phone call ends, he doesn't come back. And I sit, staring at the wall. I read all the books, counted all the tiles, felt all the ridges. I had been here so long, nothing was new. I begun to crave his company.

He came back around midnight, alcohol on his breath. He fell on my cloud and I thought he was going to heaven. “My love?” He didn't move. I repeated it, over and over and over and over and over again. He turned to me, his eyes piercing. “Shut up, call me Naruto.” I nodded, he wasn't in heaven. He was trying to escape hell.

His hand laid on my stomach, he caressed it. “It better be a boy.” He said, and I nodded. It will be. It has to be. He suddenly laughed so loudly, I was startled. Curling myself in the corner I did the routine of the drunken night. It was almost like a dance. Move back, move back, move back, press yourself against the wall and curl into yourself. That's how to protect your baby. That's how one lives.

“I remember when we first met. So beautiful and fresh, like a ripe fruit ready for the taking. Man...you were beautiful. Legs so long, hair so soft, body so supple. I wanted you, needed you.” I listed carefully, trying to recall what I once called a life.

“All those other men didn't know how to treat you, how to touch you, how to feel you. Yet you let them near you, but not me. Why didn't you, Sasuke?”

“I didn't...I didn't know.” He threw his bottle beside my head and I screeched, preforming my dance once again. Graceful.

“TELL ME WHY.” he roared and I felt sick.

 

_Dear Captor,_

 

_When I first met you, who would have known I'd be in your home tied to your walls on your floating cloud. I was sixteen. My life was amazing, I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I had everything before you. I had a boyfriend, I think his name was Neji. You told me to never to say his name again, and if I did I'd die. If you read this, by now, you would've stabbed me. Beat me. Bruised me. Broke me. Finally, you would've sent me to heaven. But your lonely blue eyes keep me shackled on this cloud. Oh, how I hate you._

_You came in the beginning of the semester, a teachers aid; that's what you were. Now you're a kidnapper, a murderer. You murdered me. You murdered my life, I'm nothing now. I hate you. You were beautiful. I remember everyone shrieked and screamed in awe, waiting for you to take their innocence. Who knew all you did was take, and take and take and take. All you give is pain. I hate you._

_You looked at me, and my faith was sealed. You saw in me something so dark, a darkness that I did not have. But, you planted that seed inside me. I didn't hate before you, but now I do. The first day I met you, you told me that I was special but I was confused. How could you think I was special, if you never knew me._

 

 

 


	2. Menma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The baby is born.
> 
> Sasuke wakes up, confused.

 

I could feel it.

The sensation of my baby pushing against me for freedom. He was coming. Oh God, I hope he is a boy. If not, we would both be gone. Up in heaven, where the clouds are real. We’d no longer have to stay on this one - dingy and dirty- we could see grandma and grandpa.

That would be nice. But, we cannot go. We cannot leave this place, the shackles around my ankle will not let me leave. Leaving is bad. So, so bad.

I laid on my back, my belly was so heavy. My baby was so impatient and mean to me. Just like his father, he kicks me. How long had he been inside I wonder. Maybe a second, a minute, a year, an eternity. Maybe It had always been there. Inside me, just waiting.

No...I had been without him, without Menma. I had other people to talk to. My mom, my dad...my older brother. That didn’t matter anymore. There’s just me and Menma now. Oh God, I hope he is a boy. A sharp pain jolsted me.

Naruto needed to come. Right now - for the first time - I needed him to come right now. Another sharp jab made me wince. Pressure between my legs. So much pressure. He could no longer wait to be on my cloud - on our cloud.

I stared up at the window, it was day time. The sun was shining. Was Naruto not home? Was he working? No. Those thoughts are bad.

He is home.

 

Watching.

 

He’ll know if I think about him being gone.

A prolonged pain hit me. I closed my eyes and laid on my cloud. Forever on this cloud. I let myself fall asleep, ignoring the pain. I was so good at ignoring the pain.

_“Good morning class.” Kakashi-sensei greeted as he entered the bustling classroom, his stark white hair followed by an unfamiliar blond one. The class grew quiet and curious. “Let me introduce you all to our new teachers aid, Naruto Uzumaki. He will be aiding me throughout the rest of the semester. Please be kind to him.”_

_The blond man bowed and shot the stunned classroom a smile. I was struck by how nice is smile was. Instantly, everyone seemed to be swooned._

_“How old are you?”_

 

_“Are you single?”_

 

_“Where are you from?”_

 

_“Wow, you’re so tall!”_

 

_The questions flooded him, he seemed nervous and frightened. As if he knew, from now on, he was prey. And he was. I pitied him._

_I waited until the end of the lesson to approach him as he looked deflated on his desk beside senseis’. I stood in front of it, holding my bag. “Hey sensei….um- I just wanted to say it was nice meeting you today and that everyone will calm down eventually. So...it’ll get better.”_

_“I hope so-” He groaned in the crook of his arm before he lifted his head to look at me and his eyes widened._

_“Is everything ok, Uzumaki-sensei?”_

I woke up with a start. My dream reminding me of forbidden thoughts. You never answered me. All you did was stare. I moved slightly and then…

 

Wet.

 

Everything was wet around me, pooling down my legs.

 

My water had broke. I looked around the room.

 

No Naruto.

 

Where was Naruto.

 

**Come back!**

 

The pain grew stronger. But, nothing could compare. I could not complain. Pain - I knew that feeling very well. It danced around my body. Caressed me and lulled me to sleep. A long time ago, I feared it. But, it loved me more than anything. It told me; you’re alive. So alive it hurts.

But, “Menma. You’re hurting me.” It begins to hurt so badly that I cannot stop screaming. “I feel you, just like your father, pushing at my insides.” I groan.

I would not fail my baby, I told myself. I remember seeing it on TV, watching someone give birth. I knew how to do it. I knew how to get my baby out but the pain had be wanting to claw him out of me. I sat up against the cold wall, it burned my skin but nothing compared.

I hiked my legs up, bending them and spreading wide. My baby would not wait, so impatient. He would never survive down here. You need patience to be here.

I do not know how long I spent gritting my teeth. Tears were streaming down my face.

“ **Naruto!! The baby, help me! Oh God, HELP ME!** ” I roared, I knew I shouldn't. I should not call him by his name. He will be mad but our baby demands of me. I slam my hands against the wall, hoping he is behind it to help me.

“Gah!” I groan out, feeling a weight bearing down between my legs. It was time.

I began to push. Pushed and pushed until I could no longer tell which way was up and down. There was so much wetness. So much pain. So many screams, my throat was raw and my hands were bleeding. Naruto would be so mad. He will hate me.

“Please forgive me. I can’t stop, it hurts. **Please help me. Naruto. Please come back.** ” My own voice felt distant.

I hear crying. Naruto is going to kill me. Too loud. My ears are ringing. Someone will hear but that’s okay, no one is looking for me. Naruto said so. He tells me everyday.

Where is he? The crying is so loud. So, so loud.

 

So. Loud.

 

_“-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stare, I am just exhausted from the day. Forgive me, I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable.” He said hurriedly and I smiled, holding a hand up to slow his roll._

_“Don’t worry about it! I just wanted to tell you that I’m excited to share this year with you. Please take care of me.” I bowed in respect for the man before me who took a step closer and I took a step back. Not wanting to be in his space._

_“I will. I will take care of you.” He said, and my ears rung. “You’re special, Sasuke. I’m excited to share this year with you too.”_

 

I blinked my eyes open. But, there was no moldy walls. No stone. I felt under me, where was my cloud? I begun to grow panicked. The baby?! Where was I and where was my baby?!

I tried to sit up but it hurt. It hurt so much. I tried one more time, managing to pull my body up.

“Don’t move.” His voice. His voice, I thirsted for it. It fed me, gave me, and took away from me. When I saw those blue, blue eyes. Tears welled in my own and I broke into heavy sobs. So heavy, it curled me into myself. A hand touched me and I flinched but it remained. No slaps? No punches? Why not?

I looked up, he was scared. He looked so scared.

“Are you not going to hit me?” I trembled.

He shook his head.

“But, I was so loud. And, no tears. Remember? No tears.”

“Stop it.” He said and I shut up. His word was all. Everything to me. “My baby is born, you gave me my son. I won’t hit you. You did it without me, without any help and for that, I want to reward you.”

“He’s a boy.” I whispered. A statement. A relief. Thank you.

 

Thank you, God.

 

“Yes, Menma Uzumaki. He looks like you, but he has my eyes.” Naruto always looked angry. But now, he looked happy. So, happy. So. So. Happy. I smiled too. I don’t know why. “I will bring him to you, you’ve been sleeping for two days. I thought you were going to die.”

Two days. Down there, two days feels like an eternity. But, up here, it was seconds. So wonderful. I cried as he brought my baby to me, my arms trembling as I cradled my sleeping love. 

Love. Menma Uzumaki. My baby.

“He does look like me. So much. He should have looked like you.” That way, he would not have to stay on the cloud. He could leave. He could be free.

“That’s okay. As long as he is here.”

I looked up from my baby to look into fond blue eyes. Eyes that tell lies.

 

“Will you hold us? Please.”

 

**_Dear Captor,_ **

**_Back then, I was not afraid of you. You took everything away from me. My life. My heart. My soul. But. Things have changed. You gave me the love of my life. Now, I fear you. For, you make me see heaven but you bring me back to hell. I used to be so blind, you were always like this. Nothing but a lie. Your smile confused me. Our son, confuses me. He is a part of you. If you find this, don’t touch him._ **

**_I should have never went with you that day._ **


	3. The Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke looks around the room.
> 
> He attempts a dangerous plan.

This window was so different from the one upstairs, it was so much better. I could not help but smile when I would see the light peeking through the window. Never touch the blinds. Ever. Do you know what that means? Bad, bad things if I do.

So, I touched everything else the moment I could walk. I touched the bedpost, it had an interesting indentation. I sometimes invent ways it could have been made; Naruto carving into it as a child, Naruto hitting it with something or Naruto bought it this way. Was he once innocent like the little baby he put inside me, the little munchkin that kept me alive and breathing. 

I ran my hands over the soft bedding, so much softer than the cloth I had on my cloud. It was so different from down there, I had inspected every corner of my cloud - blissfully ignoring the stains and tears that brought me back to reality. Because, it really was not a cloud, only a blown up air mattress with a bunch of old pillows stacked around. But... up here, things were different. The bedding was clean and tear-free, it smelled like laundry detergent and felt soft against my skin. 

Naruto slept here with me but he never stayed here during the day, he would only come at night when Menma and I were sleeping. On the cloud, he would tell me how privileged I was to be alive because he could have killed me the moment he saw me. He said so. But, up here...in this room, Naruto did not speak to me. Only rarely would he touch me during the night, running his trembling hands through my hair. I wonder if he was crying, but I did not dare open my eyes.

I brought my hands up to the plump pillows that were so much softer than the ones downstairs who seemed to never be quite right. I felt at my own, plushing it up before hitting it softly, watching as the small specks of dust blew into the air. I moved on to his but when I lifted it up to plump it, a book laid innocently on the mattress - edges of pictures poking out of the pages. I grabbed it, opening it.

“Uzumaki album…” I whispered, reading the title in shock. Something about Naruto having a family was bothersome to me. Did they know about me or were they also holding me in the confines of this house that I had not left in so long. I opened the next page, my eyes widening at the sight of a small family photo.

A tall man that looked so much like Naruto it made me flinch, his eyes held a contentment and a love for the two next to him. A women with strong green eyes and long red hair held a little baby that looked so much like the one god had given to me. I quickly realized that this was Naruto’s family. I took the picture out of the slit.

I walked over to the crib which laid not far from me, never far from me. No one would take him away from me, no one would take him away like I was taken away. He slept so peacefully, he never disobeyed his mama. His strong screams would cease once I begged. Just like his daddy. But, right now, he was sleeping.

My baby had filled in, two months old I believe. He was looking up at me quietly, inspecting me. His big blue eyes that he got from his father reminded me everyday just who gave him to me. So grateful, I am so so grateful. I touched the soft tanned cheek, watching him gurgle before trailing it up into his dark hair that felt like silk. Such a beautiful baby. My Menma. The Menma who hurt his mama so much, who kicked and hit inside of me.

“Menma, look…” I showed him the picture of his father and grandparents. “This is your...papa. He looks so much like you. But, you won’t be like him, right?” I knew he did not understand but I hoped that God was listening, and that he would grant my utmost wish. Save my baby, the baby who wounded me so deeply but breathe life into me.

I prayed on my own life that he would not, that he would escape from here. That he would be better than me...the person who put him in this house. I smiled as he giggled, reaching up grab the picture from my hands. I let him inspect and play with it for a bit before I pulled it back and slipped it into the plastic sheet. To be safe, I placed it exactly as it once was. Next time, I would look into it.

I came back to my beautiful son, eyeing him with such love. It had been two months since the painful day or night he was born. Naruto told me so. Oh how I wanted to know what day he was born, which month. A spring baby, maybe? The sun was shining outside, I wonder if it was windy or not. I would never be able to tell baby Menma if it was hot or not. I could tell him about the cold wall, the blood and the wet, wet cloud. The pain and the desperation.

I knew all about that.

I jumped when I heard the lock on the door click. I quickly turned to face the door, hands splayed on the crib. I had to protect the baby. Do anything for Menma. Die for Menma. Even if you’re scared, give your life for his. I told myself over and over. The door opened, and Naruto appeared his dark blue eyes immediately trailing towards me.

“Good morning, Sasuke.” He smiled, walking forward but I couldn’t help but flinch, he frowned. How could I do that?! I was so stupid, I needed to stay stiff. Never flinch, don’t let him know you’re scared. If you flinch, he’ll give you a reason to flinch. Never. Never. I became stiff, trying my best to smile at him as he moved to stop in front of me. 

“Is my little Menma awake? I wanted to see you both before I headed off to work.” He picked up his son, poking at his little nose. He didn’t look so evil, holding our baby.

“ It’s Friday today Sasuke. Tomorrow is my day off, so we can watch a movie in the living room as a family. Would you like that?” My ears immediately perked up at the thought of seeing something other than this room. I was beginning to become greedy. I was never like this back on my cloud. Id ought to go back there.

“I-I would...Ye-yes I would…” I stuttered, trembling. I could not take my eyes off my baby, what if he hurt him? Hit the little human I created inside me for so long. His hand, so much bigger than our baby was poking his little tummy. He was never that nice with me. Never.

“I’m...glad we are getting along now.” He said as he put my baby back in his crib, ignoring the little whine he made. “With you being up here now, I think we can make a lot of progress. We can start working on our relationship and maybe, one day when I can trust you again, I could let you roam the house.”

“B-but...you told me that I could never...not even if I was nice…” I knew I shouldn’t be questioning but I was so surprised that he would consider letting me outside of the basement. This room was already enough of a shocker. He wrapped his big arms around me, surrounding me with his warmth. 

I tensed, but wrapped my arms around him. I don’t know why. Maybe it was because I haven't hugged anyone in so long, maybe it’s because I felt alive to someone finally. Even if it was the person who took everything from me.

I felt his cheek rest on the crown of my hair. “Things are different now. We have Menma, there’s something keeping you and me together. I want us to be a family, that is what I have always wanted but you were keeping that from me.” He blamed me and I began to sob, pleading for him to forgive me even if it was not true. I cried and cried because it was true. He and I, were linked forever now.

All of this was a reality. Once, I was the boy that got kidnapped by his stalker TA. But now, things were different. I am now, the boy that got pregnant and had a baby with his kidnapper. I could only imagine that that would be the headline if someone ever found me.

Chances are it would be; ‘Body found in a lake, missing person Sasuke Uchiha identified as body.’ I did not let myself mull on that for long as Naruto pulled away and wiped my tears. 

“I have to go now, class is starting soon but...I’ll treat you to something nice when I come back, okay?”

Oh how I hoped it was freedom.

 

-xxxx-

 

When Naruto came home, a couple hours later, I was sitting in the bed with Menma firmly clamped to my nipple as he sucked away at my milk. He waltzed into the room, holding a plastic bag full of what looked like food. My mind swirled, I had not eaten all day and it smelled heavenly. I looked down, knowing that he would sit and eat in front of me, until he was satisfied. Then, I would get the scraps.

“Come, the movie is already on downstairs. Bring a blanket for Menma.” He ordered before exiting, but I knew he was standing just at the foot of the door. I did as I was told and began the shaky walk towards the door.

I was trembling, my hands holding onto my baby the best I could as I took in my surroundings.  I had never seen these parts of the house, the walls were painted a soft shade of beige and there were two brown doors that probably led to the bathroom and something else. I barely had time to incrave all the little marks, my mind was moving too quickly. There was too much going on. My shaking legs carried me down the flight of stairs as I stared in a daze at the front door. 

If I ran...

I had Menma in my arms, Naruto was not paying attention.

I could do it.

But, my feet would not carry me further, no matter how much they itched to run. Something inside me clenched at the idea of facing the world. Of being not near the person who gave me my son. I stood frozen at the bottom of the steps, reminiscing on everytime I had tried to struggle. The beating would have me close to death. He would pull me by my hair, dragging me right back down the steps before battering me with the reasoning of; I had betrayed him. His fist would rain on me until I could not longer see or feel, all I could do was cry. Only then, he would stop and leave.

Would he do the same to our baby, if I ran away? He would not hurt his own blood, when I was pregnant, his hands would never ever touch my stomach. He would slap me, but never hurt his own son. He could never. My eyes welled with tears as my feet stayed rooted to the bottom of the steps. I could leave my baby...he would take care of him. Right? I could be without Menma, the love of my life. I tried to convince myself but, I knew I would die without him.

I tried not to think of that as I ripped my eyes away from the only way out of this nightmare. I sat down beside Naruto who took our son from my arms in order to cradle him, rocking him gently. I should have gone, I trembled beside him and my body had begun to sweat. He would find us...he would kill me. I watched as he placed the movie into the DVD player, before he turned around to smile down at me.

“I think you’ll like this movie,” He stated, sounding happier than he had ever been. He was always so mad. “I always pegged you for an action movie lover so this should be fun.” He sat back down and I nodded in agreement. But, in reality, I hated action movies but...never disagree after all Naruto says he knows me best - better than I know myself. 

 

-xxxx-

 

I watched as the credits rolled down the screen, the movie had been good. I had not watched a movie in so long, it felt as if I was seeing a world I had never lived before. I wonder if new things have come out in the time I have been here. I wonder if I was still on the news. Naruto used to show me the stories about me, how they knew I had been kidnapped but could not find me. Then, he showed me my funeral. I cried so much that night, I thought I would flood the basement. 

I watched as my baby slept peacefully in the makeshift bed we made for him with blankets. I smiled, running my fingers through his soft and sparse hairs. I looked up suddenly at the sound of a snore, to my surprise, Naruto was sleeping beside me.

My heart dropped, he was sleeping and I was here, downstairs to roam free. My eyes zoned into the phone innocently mounted on the kitchen wall. I could call someone, speak so so so quietly and Naruto would be none the wiser. He would never know. Unless...he knew I was thinking about it. I trembled, my hands becoming moist from my nerves. If I did this...my baby and I would be free. 

I had to try.

I got up as slowly as I could, paying mind to not touch any part of Naruto’s body by accident. The second my feet stood firmly on the ground, it felt as I was entering another world. I moved on my own, leaving my baby on the couch. No more than two steps away, the mounted phone mocked me. Laughing at me for hesitating, laughing at me for not fighting hard enough to get away. I gently ran my hand along the receiver, wrapping my fingers around the old-school phone before bringing it up to my hear.

I shut my eyes tightly, hands trembling on the numbers. 9-1-1 or Itachi. Who to call? I was shaking as my finger pressed into the number nine. Soon, I reached for the one.

“What do you think you’re doing!?” The voice of my captor roared from behind me before I felt someone strike me.

The last thing I heard was my baby boy crying.

 


	4. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of the events.
> 
> Naruto's manipulation continues, and Sasuke grows desperate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!
> 
> I haven't been really good at communicating with those who read this story but I thought it would be important for me to say something about the story. This is an extremely dark story, so if its bad now, it'll only get worse. It won't be an average ordinary love story, and there might be things that could be triggering, so I would recommend reading with caution. 
> 
> Other than that, thank you all so much for the reviews and general interest in this story!

 

_ They say when you die, you see a bright, white light. And, then everything feels like you’re floating on a big fluffy cloud. A cloud that carries you up into the arms of those who had left you before. The bright light was enough of a sign, I was probably dead. I groaned, the light stinging my eyes. I could not open them, it hurt too much. I could hear a woman’s voice calling me, but...that’s not possible. Naruto said no one could ever see me, never ever. If someone sees me, then...then I will be stuffed in a bag, floating down the river. _

 

_ I frowned as the voice kept calling me, Sasuke...Sasuke! It kept repeating over and over again, I wanted it to stop. It was piercing my ears, I groaned once again. And then, finally my eyelids snapped open against my will and I was staring up at a curtain of dark hair and a beautiful pale face. A face that surely belonged to an angel, the face flashed me a worried smile and tears began to spring forwards. No crying...Naruto said no crying but, I had to. _

 

_ “M-mom...!” I whined, my desire to throw myself in her arms was too strong. She quickly caught me in a warm embrace and I sobbed as hard as I could, as hard as I wanted to. I was so confused but this felt so right I did not want to question it. I did not want to see another sight again. My mother, the woman who I thought about so so so much, was finally right here. I was safe, so safe in her arms. “Mommy...I was so scared!” I was hyperventilating, someone had saved me. _

 

_ “Oh no, baby,” She cooed, running her long fingers through my hair, pushing it away from my eyes. I sniffled looking up at her. She moved her hands down to cup my cheeks. “Its okay, Sasuke. It’s over now, everything is okay.” She reassured me and I pulled away from her embrace, looking around to see where my baby was. I could not believe I had allowed myself to feel selfish belief without knowing where my little Menma was. But, when I inspected all four corners of my room, there was no sign of any crib nor any of my baby’s soft whimpers. _

 

_ “Wh-where is my…”I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat. “Mom, where’s my baby?” _

_ She looked at me with an air of confusion, a frown firmly set on her features. “What are you talking about Sasuke? You don't have a baby…Honey, is there something you need to tell me?” The same question she would ask me every time I came home looking a bit down. I had not heard those words from her in so long but this time...I did have something to tell her. I knew I had a baby, there was no way I did not have Menma! _

 

_ Maybe, she just had not learned that Menma is my baby! That’s okay, I was sure that my rescue would  bring along a lot of confusion. ‘The lost boy, now found’ would surely be the primary source of conversation. Next, they would talk about the boy born from a kidnapper and a kidnapee.  _

 

_ I shook my head, “Mom, when I went missing...I-I had a baby with my kidnapper. Did they not tell you when they rescued me? I don’t really remember who did but...did they not rescue me with a baby?!” I began to panic, my mind forming conclusions that had me begging for answers. What if Naruto just dumped me on the side of a road after I tried to make that phone call!? _

 

_ “Honey. Listen to me, I think you had a nightmare...there is no baby and you were never kidnapped” She started, “You were just at school yesterday…After everything that happened, I knew you would...I knew...”And suddenly, buzzing began to fill my ears. Her mouth was forming words that made no sound.  _

 

_ So, it never happened? _

 

_ No basement. _

 

_ No cloud. _

 

_ No Naruto…?! _

 

_ No Menma!? _

 

_ I broke down in painful sobs, doubling over into my mother's lap. _

 

-xxxx-

 

_ “Are you sure you want to go to school today? I can call the school and let them know you aren’t feeling well...I know it’s been hard and that dream really shook you up.” My father mumbled worriedly, facing me at the doorway. I had explained everything to the both of them, awarding me with worried looks and reassurance. Naruto had never existed and nothing had ever happened to me. The night before I had gone to bed with a fever, and it must have consumed my dreams. _

 

_ I shook him a shaky smile, trying my best to show him and my mother who was watching from her spot on the couch, that I was okay. “Yea...I’m sure. I think I need to see everyone at school to calm me down and bring me back to reality.”  _

 

_ They nodded with sad looks on their face and I headed out, wishing that my brother had been home. All I wanted was to see every single face that I had missed so much...or at least, what the me in my nightmare had missed so much.  _

 

_ With every step of the way, my feet seemed to be positively floating. I cherished every rock that found its way in my path, paying extra attention to the little bumps in the road that I had never cared about. I smiled at the flowers that paved the road, adoring their scent and the bees that flew around them, spreading their pollen.  _

 

_ I wanted to take in every detail possible, drinking up the feeling of relief. I ran my hands down every pole I passed. I drummed my fingers on the strong wooden structures until my hand accidentally tugged at a cold piece of plastic, sending it fluttering to the ground face down. Bending down, I picked up the paper and dread filled me. _

**_“Missing Person_ **

**_Itachi Uchiha_ **

**_Never to be seen again.”_ **

 

-xxxx-

 

“How hard did you hit him?” A muffled nazzly voice said.

 

“I don’t know...I just lost it, I kept hitting him after he was knocked out so I really don’t know. Fuck Kabuto, he was so close to calling some fucker while I was asleep. I would’ve lost my family...my baby...I just could not stop.” There was regret mixed with a faint crying in the background. My eyes could not muster enough strength to open once more. I felt my chest begin to become constricted, a tell-tale of the tears that would soon come. I could hear my baby.

 

“You almost killed him, Naruto. Next time, hit somewhere else if you’re trying to keep h- I’m sorry but I can’t check on him with that fucking baby crying.” That voice again.

 

“I don’t fucking care, live with the crying. I’m paying you to do your job so take care of that little bitch.” 

 

“Fine.” The other man scoffed, and I felt something tap against a surface near my head. “I need him out of the closet for that. I can’t possibly change his bandages in here again.” 

 

“No! If he wants to try to fucking leave, then he will stay in the fucking closet until he’s begging for my forgiveness.” The loud voice boomed within my small enclosure. My eyes peeled open, forcing me into awareness. 

 

“P-please…” My head was pounding, the words struggling to leave my dry throat. The bandages around my head felt so constricting. This was it...this was reality. No mom, no dad...and Itachi was not gone, I was the one who no longer existed outside the gaze of my captor.

 

“He’s awake...I can hear him.” The man known as Kabuto said, I could see him through the thin cracks of the closet door. He was a tall man, lanky and scary looking. His big, round glasses covering almost the entirety of his face, resting upon his imposing nose. I had seen him many times when Naruto was more violent.

 

“Good, I was getting tired of hearing him whimper about his mom.” So It really was just a dream.

 

I began to sob pathetically, ignoring all the rules that Naruto had set for me. I sobbed and screamed as hard as I could, harder than when I gave birth to my son, my feet slamming into the thin wood until someone slammed the door open and I was dragged out of the closet onto the floor.

 

“ **Help me!** ” My lungs were burning, everything around me was a blur as my vision tried to adjust to the fast movements. A strong hand slapped me, whipping my head to the side, shutting me up as my vision swam.

 

I was dragged up by the long blood-stained collar of my shirt, pulling me face to face with angry blue eyes. “You wanna disobey now!? After everything I’ve done for you! I gave you a bed to sleep on and loved you like no one else could yet you still made me do what I had to. You should have never, NEVER touched that phone! You are so lucky that you are the mother of my child, because if you weren’t, I would not have hesitated to kill you.” His rant morphed into threatening whispers directed into my ears. 

 

I shut my tear filled eyes, trying desperately to reach the dream I had once been basked in, to go back into my mother’s arms. To be held so gently once again. But, there was no going back, there was no way this was a dream. I was shoved into the closet, the doors shut and padlocked once I hit the floor. I turned around as quick as I could, clawing at the door. Begging and apologizing, wanting to see my baby so desperately.

 

I knew the Kabuto had left, he never stayed very long when Naruto would begin to lose his temper. 

 

“You should have thought about that before you tried to ruin our family, Sasuke. I just can’t forgive you for trying to hurt our baby-”

 

“I-I...I wasn’t tryin-”

 

“Yes, yes you were. You were trying to hurt the baby we had so much trouble having. And, for what? The miserable life you had before? You were dating a man who stopped talking about you a week after I took you. You hated your dad, I remember you crying on the phone to your brother. The only one you really liked was your mom and I gave you that. I made you a mom, so you don’t need her. Yet you still did this to me?” The man was speaking in such a calm tone, I began to tremble, my hands falling from the slits to hold myself upright.

 

“I’m sorry…! Never again!” I begged for his forgiveness. His words pierced me so violently, he was wrong. I did not hate my father, our relationship had been complicated but I never meant it when I spat hateful things at him. I never meant it. And Neji....

 

“All I ever wanted was a family...that’s it. Am I asking for too much? Is it really so hard for you to love me, to love our son and the life I built for us. You’ll never have to work a day in your life, you don’t even have to lift a finger. It could be so easy, if you just let me give you the love you deserve.” He was speaking so softly, I felt the tips of his fingers touch mine through the slits between the bars. “Don’t you want a family?”

 

I clenched my eyes shut tightly, the image of my moms smiling face and my father’s worried looks, my feverish mind morphing them into images of Naruto, Menma and I...happy. I sobbed, feeling so sick all of a sudden.

“I do…I do want a family.” I croaked out. “I wanna see my son.”

 

He seemed satisfied.

 

I felt the doors of the closet pull away from my fingers, and slowly the darkness of the room was revealed to me. It was daytime when I got in the closet...how long had it been? I didn’t have much time to think about it as warm arms were wrapped around me.

 

“Please…” I clawed at his back desperately, hot tears dripping down my sweaty face. My throat was so dry and my heart felt like it was shattering. I just wanted to feel the comforting sensation of having my baby lay on my chest, his little hairs tickly my cheek. “..my son!” I begged to see him, he simply petted my bandaged covered head.

 

“Lets go to bed, you have a fever.” He smiled, lifting me up in his arms with ease. I felt so good to be held again, I gripped at him tightly, not caring that not moments earlier he had so violently grabbed me. That he is the reason I feel so much pain.

 

I just wanted someone to love me. I wanted to be held and cherished.

 

“...family.” I mumbled, dazed as sleep carried me away.


	5. Daddy Had a Mean Daddy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke finds out about Naruto's past and begins to fall prey to his situation

 

I woke up on the soft bed, covered so tightly by the thick duvet, warming me up so deliciously. I hummed in pleasure, digging myself deeper into the fluffy pillow; hissing as pain erupted from the wounds on my head. I reached up to touch the tender area only for my hand to be snatched back by a large tanned hand. My eyes shot open in fear, immediately I was trembling, looking into deep blue eyes that were too too too close to me. 

He said, no more hitting after the baby and he had already broken his promise.

It was very rare for me to wake up in this bed with Naruto right beside me. He usually went to bed after I would fall asleep and he would be gone before I woke up. I would hear him in the morning, giving Menma some attention before getting dressed to head to work. He would sometimes come and run his fingers through my hair, only stopping when I would begin to tremble.

Seeing him here, scared me. Yet, I could not move away in fear. I had already messed up so badly, he would for sure kill me if I flinched. Then, Menma would have no mommy and I would never see my beautiful baby. My beautiful baby, with the big blue eyes and soft laugh. He was becoming so expressive every single day. I wondered if Naruto was also an expressive child. He did not smile very much, only when he would look at our son - his eyes would light up. 

Maybe all babies are expressive, I never had the chance to ready any baby books, I simply learned as I went.

“Don’t touch it, I don’t want your wounds to open up again.” Naruto warned, letting go of my hand to rest his fingers against a bruise under my eye. “You were talking in your sleep all night, I barely got any sleep.” I groaned and yawned, tears pricking his eyes. My own eyes widened in fear. What had I said?

“Di-Did I say anything...anything bad?” I hoped that I had not mentioned anything about my dream, Naruto hated anything related to my family. He would say, if you think about them I will know and I will make sure you never think again. He would destroy me. I know it. 

Thankfully, he shook his head. 

“You were talking about Menma,” Of course, all could think about is the only person I live for. My beautiful Menma. “Nothing bad. Since you promised you wouldn’t think about anything bad, that simply cannot happen. Right?” He smiled, running his fingers from my bruise to down my neck. 

“No...I-I would never think about anything beside our son and...and you. I have nothing else to think about.” I tried to reassure him but I could see in his eyes that he had not forgotten about what I had tried to do.

“You’re lying.” He whispered, so low that I could barely hear him. I begun to shake, tears forming in my eyes,  my head beginning to throb already. Reminding me of what he had done and would surely do again if I attempted to deceive him once more. “Do you know what would have happened had you called someone, Sasuke? They’d take our baby away, they would take me away and you would have no one.”

His voice began to tremble, his words becoming spaced out by long pauses to breathe. I looked into blue eyes filled with tears and...fear? But, why. I could not wrapped my finger around it as I listen to him continue speaking.

“Having no one...no one to hold you and tell you everything would be okay. Can you imagine a life like that?” He was crying now and I began to sob as well. I don’t know why, but my heart began to throb painfully in my chest. “No one ever...I-I never…” He crumbled into himself, his body slowly curling into a tight ball of tears and so much sorrow. I had never seen him like this, he had always been so angry. 

“I-I saw...I mean-didn’t you have a family?” My heart was pounding as I wrenched those words from my chest, braving through the stormy waters that would surely capsize me. “...a mom and a dad?” I clarified, trying my best to make sense of his feelings. I should not care, after everything he had done to me but my head was aching and I wanted his arms around me. I wanted him to understand that I felt pain too. I felt so much pain by his hands.

“I had them once...no, no actually I only ever had a mom. That man, was never anything to me.” He spat out, the sadness turning into boiling rage. I remember, looking like that one time. I had tried to escape during one of my bathings when Naruto thought I was sleeping. He had taken off my cuff to wash the area, and I had taken the opportunity to run. But, he shoved me against the wall and I fought him. So much anger...I could not longer feel that. After that beating, I learned to never show him anger.

I mustered up all the courage within me to ask what his father had done to him, he downturned his eyes, his fists were clenched as he told me all that had happened with his father. 

“I don’t know where to start, frankly I don’t know much about my beginnings.” He chuckled bitterly and I nodded, shaking like a leaf. “When I was a kid, my dad was sick, or that is at least what my grandmother had told me. She told me that, after he had me, things had changed. My mother and him would fight constantly. They would not speak for days and I would cry for hours and hours with my mother. And...he would just...yell.”

He swallowed thickly, and carried on when he saw I had nothing to say. “Then, one day, my mom tried to leave when I was a bit older. And...according to the police reports, he beheaded her in front of me. Leaving me alone for the rest of my life.”

“I-In front of you?” I breathed out in horror, my eyes wide and afraid. He nodded, looking contemplif. “Yes. I don’t really remember it, but I dream about it somethings. Him killing my mom...even if I was so young, I still see it in my sleep. Even if...even if I did not have her for very long...I loved her and I know she loved me too. I know she didn’t want to die. ”

“W-where is your dad now…?”

“Rotting in jail.” He said as he got up, walking over to our fussing baby, picking him up before laying him between us in the bed. We watched him kick his little legs and arms for a while, a fond smile on his lip while tears continued to stream down my cheeks at his story.

“That won’t ever happen to Menma. You can’t leave him...like my mom left me. He will forever have the both of us, to love and cherish him.” His voice, dripped in sadness, penetrated my heart like a knife. Oh how I wanted to laugh in his face and tell him that he was so much like his father. But, when I looked into those eyes, fondly observing our son, I wished he would have had a family like my own.

I wished he had been loved. Then, maybe, he would have never done to me all of which he had done.

“If you leave...he will be so lost and alone. Even I, would not be able to give him the love he needs from his mother. I can’t...I can’t lose you either. We had a rough start but...I do love you so much. Do you love me too, Sasuke?”

I love you because if I don’t, you’ll kill me. I wanted to say but I knew I would die not long after.

“I love you, more than I love myself. I love you more than anything...I won’t try to leave again, I promise.” I was crying again, it was beyond me. Like most things in my life now; beyond my control.

He smiled and leaned in, placing a tender kiss on my lips. The first kiss we had shared in a long time. Once, they made me want to vomit but now, my heart wanted to love him. Loving him meant survival. So I will love him, more than anyone ever did. I looked down at our son’s curious blue eyes gazing up at his parents, and I deepened the kiss. Molding my lips onto his with all my might. Conveying the deep sorrow I felt, the desire for normalcy. 

I wanted to be normal.

I pulled away when I felt his hand drift down onto my exposed inner thighs, his sly fingers playing with my intimacy. I pushed at his chest against my better judgement but thankfully, he did not recoil to slap me. He eyed me, questioning me as if this was something that was usually done consensually. As if my opinion had ever mattered before.

“...I can’t. Kabuto said we need to wait for me to heal...I don’t know how much time as passed but it still hurts all over. Fro-From the birth and...when you hit me.” He smiled, brushing off what I said in favor of dropping a kiss on our son’s head before getting up and heading towards the door.

“I’m going to make us some breakfast. Any requests?”

Yes, everything I had missed for so long. 

“No...whatever is nice.” It was acting out in my mind again, I ought to be brought back down into the basement. I allowed myself to take in a deep breath of air once the door was closed and locked. 

I pulled my cooing baby onto my chest, pushing down my pj top so that he could latch onto my nipple, suckling away at my milk. I felt my heart swell with love as his blue eyes stared up at me with so much wonder and adoration. 

His beautiful blue eyes, that one day will turn into stone. Darkened by hatred because daddy beheaded mommy in front of him. Because no one loved him. Because the family he was born in betrayed him. So, he would steal one with those dark blue eyes. Forcing love because love only leaves if its not held down and beaten.

I wiped the pearl of milk running down his little lips, smiling softly down at him. I leaned down gently, kissing his soft head.

“Daddy had a mean Daddy, but you won’t be like daddy right? Because, you have mommy and daddy. And I will make sure you only know a good daddy so you can be good.” I hummed, hugging the love of my life close to my chest.

When Naruto came back with a platter full of pancakes, I scarfed them down savagely. I had not had a pancake in so long, the pain and distress from those times of being restricted flushed through me as I wolfed them down. Eat. Eat as much as you can while he is being so so so nice. That was the mentality that belonged in the basement with the old Sasuke.

The Naruto that showed himself here in this room was so different. He fed me so good and spoke nicely, only hitting me when I misbehaved. My head throbbed at the thought.

I watched him sip with his coffee from the corner of my eye, he was on his phone. Tapping away at the screen quickly with a frown on his face. I felt anger rise up in my heart, but I brushed it off. He had taken me away from existence yet could not even give me all his attention.

I flinched at my own thought. When I had first gotten here, the last thing I wanted was for him to even look at me yet, now I could stomach it.

“N-Naruto...what is Menma’s birthday? I-I don’t really know...we never spoke about it and time has gone by...hes so much bigger now….-” I was rambling, trying to make conversation with the only one who I could talk to. He hummed absentmindedly with a uncaring look on his face, tapping on his phone some more, his fingers moving quickly. I’m sure I would be much slower, I hadn’t texted anyone in years.

“Who are you...talking to?” I asked, curiosity getting the better of me. He looked up at me, almost as if he was going the regret the words he was about to tell me. Putting the phone down, he reached over to brush my bangs out of my swollen eye.

“Your brother, he and I have not seen each other since Menma was born. But...don’t worry,” He smiled, resting his hand on my cheek, his thumb gently rubbing under my bruised eye. “Now that I have all of you, I don’t have to settle for someone whos not quite you.”

My son laughed against my chest, finding my hair amusing.

Unwillingly, happiness laced with disgust bloomed in my chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late updates! I'm trying to plan this story a little more. IF ANYONE has any suggestions on how to plan stories and creating a posting schedule.
> 
> Thanks <3

**Author's Note:**

> TBC????


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